No Love

He doesn't love me
not really
not like a woman needs to be loved
longs to be loved

a little recognition
a gentle touch
an adoring smile
a kind word
a sincere compliment

they never float naturally my way
rather, they must be asked for
begged for
leaving the response stale
stagnant and disingenuous

for years I thought I
wasn't worth more
was lucky for the love I received
any little drop
any small morsel

but as self awareness expands
need for love stretches wide
need for assurance gaps like a wound
need for support leaves body aching

he refuses to read my writing
refuses to bask in new woman
refuses to discover me new, sexy, redefined
he doesn't love me
not really
not like I need to be loved