Doubt

Doubt is crowding me
creeping along the edges of my mind
stretching its tenacle across me
Doubt is expanding within me
making me question
what I thought was right
was real
was certain
Turning my definites
into my maybes
my musts
into my possibles

I despise doubt
yet, I am not
strong enough to fight it
want to fight it
I doubt me
what I am about
who I am
what I can accomplish
why I should even try

It is fear,
this doubt
these quiet mumblings of defeat
it is simply fear, but it is controlling
numbing, blinding
deafening
this doubt
sometimes it is simply too much
this doubt