Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Never Knew

I never knew
your eyes were so beautiful
so round
so brown
so expressive
so clear
I just never knew

I never paid attention
never clued in
looked all over and around
up and down
but not at the windows to your soul
never daring to glance at the
clear pane to your essence

Beautiful
your eyes are stunning
intense and focused
pure and wide
secret intent hidden but revealed
secret desire exposed but covered up
and I never noticed before
cause I never actually looked
deep into
your eyes

What did you feel
when I finally did it
finally lowered chin, paused
hesitated and decided to
really look
really examine
really take the time to see
you
your eyes
your beauty

Sunday, February 25, 2007

My Fault

Got to be fair
it just might be my fault
did I
release want and desire
into the air like
opening the vacuum suctioned lid
unable to contain
fresh scent wonderful aroma as
it carries through airwaves
wafting and sifting
luring those tuned in
keen enough to get a whiff
to come take a sample bite
a luscious lick, a tiny taste


Got to be fair
maybe the sudden urging
you felt
was the mere overflow from
new found woman lust
bubbling and peculating
springing up and spilling over
running loosely down and spilling all around
spreading quickly, sprinkling lightly
impossible to contain
saturating you and your mind
with new thoughts and challenges
sudden urges that compelled
attracting you and overtaking your
common sense

Got to be fair
maybe I made the first move
covert and instinctual
bringing us to this place
this spot
wondering how we got here
and what we should do next....

Between His Arms

Warm comforting space
longing and inviting
tucked between well defined shoulders
centered around broad masculine neck
the crook at the center of the breastplate
a perfect resting place
for the slight touch
or the palm of my hand

between his arms

I want to fold in
press firmly against
snuggle deep within, see my
lowered lids and content expression
eyes rolling back after the
deep inhale submerging me in
luxurious scent

Notice his shoulders curved to
cocoon me and surround me
temporarily protect and shield me
hiding me from sight while
he takes in every inch of me
mind acquiescing and
shutting out the world
clinging gently to the
swell and curve of your
back and each
ripple and muscle in between
momentary peace
fulfilled want

between his arms

Friday, February 23, 2007

Purple

Purple

deep raw mahogany
majestic and brilliant
speaking of awe inspiring beauty
pure magnifiscence
wrapped in caramel
blended slowly
every turn folding
luxuriousness into
whipped sexy
gorgeous maleness
kingdom inheriting and
heir to the throne
distinguishment
donning gold
pure spun, indicating
royalty and infinite wisdom
a mind numbing
satsfying

purple

purple

Thursday, February 22, 2007

No Comparison

He dismisses
while you study and watch
focus in from afar and
notice my secret emotion
observe bubbling well overflowing
longing to lap up the sweet water
knowing only you can
keep my well from running dry

He ignores
while you tap in
creating conversation
light and easy but
deep and thick
underlying want and tension
raising the small hairs on the
nape of my neck
your intention
laid out and clearly spelled
your eyes promising joys unmentionable
and adventures unforetold

He takes for granted
while you raise up high
glorifying and praising clear
womanhood
identifying lushful bloom and
buzzing near like
bee sipping nectar
storing and protecting
fiercely and selfishly
guarding natures sweetest honey

He wallows in self pity
while you find future in
the curve of my hip
the swell of my breasts
the sway of my lower back
the ridge of my inner thigh
present, no time for
lost hopes or dreams
you achieved and attained it all
leaving blame at the door
funneling time and energy and
desire for
manifestation
into a clearly and highly wanted
perfect solution

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

I Can Show You

Are you sure you want to learn?
positive you are ready to be taught?

Mine is a different type of love
a sweeter form of intimacy
searching the crevices of your spirit and
examining every inch of your being
listening to each muscle moan and
learning every reflexive response

We can take our time
listen to the rhythm of each heart
can you feel how mine races
just because your eyes have rested on me
have taken the time to really see me
reflect back a beauty
that I have never actually attained
mirror a genuine admiration
at which I sigh and shake my head
causing me to want to love you
to give you the best that I have
the most intimate me that I can offer

Or we can lose ourselves in the passion
let go and allow the thunder to roll
the sound to fill every orifice and
create its own vibe, its own stimulation
cause a tantric river to run
within us, flow throughout us
rising with each gentle lap against
this love's private banks and
fall with the smooth tide slowly retreating
by the natural pull of the moon

Magnetic
I can show you
teach you how to
tap into the atmosphere
the earthly natural wonder
that is created in you
expand your sensual mind
pique your every sense
until we both fade away
into brilliance's magnifiscence
holding holds and
deeply intertwined
a unique solo breath
a rare encounter

but I can show you
If you are ready to be taught...

Rejection of Me

This dance is tiring
momentarily exhilarating
infinitely draining

How can you keep rejecting me?
how can you keep being
the only one who sees
nothing special in me
nothing amazing, nothing pure
nothing worth grasping onto
holding close
clinging to instinctively and
protecting without clarification
taking the chance of being
dead ass wrong
for the opportunity
of shielding me just right

The shadows are filled with
so many who see
who wait in the wings
wondering when I will wake up or
be left, once again
blamed for all the wrongs in the world and
remembered with every painful recollection
making the second time the easiest time
to put an end to the painful game
the dreadful dance
the inherent rejection of me and
everything that I am
again and again and again

A Man

A man
although I hadn't noticed it before
therefore incorrectly assumed
newness
believed curiosity or
inadvertent revelation had the
cat's tongue tied but
maternal nudging would
relax the situation
remove stiff air and
allow breathe to be absorbed

Instead the abbreviated ouput
garned sincere input
locked on, determined manifestation
through chin, strongly set and
competitive resolve, unflinching and unblinking
pouring forth proof and
determining one truth

you ain't scared

innocent curiosity be damned
newness been passed, faded away while
experience intertwined with
nature's unique bestowments
created a different type of creature
unfazed and uneasily read
shield in place and
barriers around every angle
unless clear intent to
disseminate message
sent easy and open, therefore
no confusion and no fear
turning tables and making certain another revelation

while everyone was looking
but no one was watching
there was formed
a man

The Call

I made the call
today
couldn't help it
couldn't hide from it
tried to run within myself
reign in the curiosity and
disguise the blatant intrigue
I couldn't
shouldn't
musn't
but certainly did

I made the call
heard the smile, again
heard the pause, the relaxed breathe
the instant connection
acknowledgment
importance, remembrance
inquisitive about
where I be and
what I do
why I am and
how long I will
hinting at situation complication but
willingness to forge forward
press through
burrow under and
hide within

carving out specialness
a hidden concave of
pleasure and safety
for just me
protection of the purity
uniqueness oneness
of it all

I made the call
today
and I'm glad I did

Sunday, February 18, 2007

I'm Busted

You busted me
I'm caught
you turned the corner
before my shield fell in place

before I stilled my heart and mind
numbed all emotion and perception
shut down any hint of desire
you walked up on me
caught me by surprise
before i had deeply exhaled
locked air in chest and
painfully purged all unwanted thoughts
of you

damn

It was all over my face
my mental, played out like a projector
my mind ticking, displaying the
reel of desire
of unbridled passion and
focused discovery that
can never, ever, be

And you saw it
received it
held onto it
verification and confirmation
receipt of
soul purchased by your
very male essence and
heart taken
by your simple presence

You busted me and
I can't deny it

I'm caught up.

Under Armor

Who created Under Armor?
if I didn't know better
I would swear it was a women
who had similar imaginings or
a delectable sensual mind set
just like me

So distracting
trying to focus on
neck and above
talking to brotha sporting
Under Armor wear

Trying to ignore
broad chest and
muscle ripped channels
flowing so smoothly
eloquently
under colored shirt

Creation that is just a
highlighter
the accent mark, the
explanation point or
flashing neon arrow pointed
solely at
male beauty

Reminding me of
teenage years and childhood stars
when football players sported
chopped up t-shirts with metal cleats
and buffed brothas roamed the streets
shirtless and cut
using hot days as opportunites
to lure the mind and
clearly display
black beauty in all its glory

making my mind wonder
fingers aching to
lightly trace
the every curve and ripple of
masculine wonder

Some days I got to curse
the creator of Under Armor
trying so hard to
stay focused and not let mind wonder
not explore mental adventures
incited by the very sight of
the fitted wear

Other days, I just give in
watching professionals or collegiates
tear away uniforms and
expose tight swath of fabric
wondering how a man could
seem so magnifiscent
how a body could
exude such physical brilliance
how these brothas can be so clueless
messin with my mind and
eliminating the entire purpose
of watching the sport

Who in the hell created Under Armor?

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Don't Fall In Love

You promised not to fall in love
remember?
that was the only condition
the only unbreakable rule

But now love is in your eyes
pouring through with every blink
an ideal of me and you
a possible life together, a future
and you know it can never be

Recall how this started
behind closed doors
through hushed whispers and
quietly locked eyes
removing ourselves, responding to
your hints, flirts, approaches
my responses, affirmations and purrs

We navigated deep waters and dark trenches
spread open wide searching
breathing, enjoying
removing obstacles and granting freedom
expression, free from judgement
discovering natural passion
without inhibition

But I explained it before
told you not to let this happen
to remember not to confuse
lust with love
passion with promise
release with reliance
climax with claim

We can't confuse this or
get wrapped into its potential
we must keep it separate, distinct
enjoy love making and
soul comforting
without life merging or hope intertwining

Please, please
remember our promise

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

First Valentine's Day

Do you remember the first one
the first Valentine's day
when love was so new and unsure
with no expectation and little pressure
feeling lucky to have met
to have you by my side

What a romantic day
you cooked my first meal while
friends scoffed and laughed
cause you swallowed pride and cooked for me
speaking of the intimate bond that had formed
in less that a year

I whispered to you
that I couldn't wait to
share my space
let you in and
reward your courage
your freedom
your risk taking
in the name of love

And that was one of the sweetest nights
the most memorable of evenings
long and never ending
wrapped in each others arms

I remember the first one
that Valentines Day
the first time that love became
true and clear in my heart
the first time my focus turned
fully on only you and, for the first time,
I wanted no one else
but you

Removing Doubt

Deep in thought
formulating new fiction in my head
Eyes open, but unseeing
I came to and discovered you
watching me
eyes locked into mine

I quickly looked away
attempting to veil my mental musings
cover my endless, boundless thoughts
erase my trance like state
tucking away new story for
later privacy

It just occurred to me
that was the last to
you met eyes with me
the last time you
kindly smiled or
seemed relaxed in my presence

Now you avoid me
like I am plagued and problematic
going above and beyond the necessary measures
to pretend I don't exist
am not in your physical sphere
or standing right in front of your face

What happened?

In that split second
a friend became a foe
a comfortable space became a
tension filled pocket
a casual acknowledgement
became a continual dismissal

I am not sure of the what and the why's
and guess I really shouldn't care
but am surprised to discover
that I do
helpless to change circumstance
or reverse whatever negativity
I inadvertently caused
I am content to remain
in the edges of the shadows
beyond your circle
out of the reaches of your world
hopefully eliminating your discomfort and
removing speculative doubt

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Take Your Breath Away

Sister, girlfriend
has a man ever
took your breath away

No I mean, really
it could just be me but
the sight of some men makes me have to
bow head and find some composure
or at least the facade of
self dignity until I can
got to a private space and
deeply exhale

A certain man can walk into my space
and distract my entire focus
interrupt my sentence as it tumbles from my lips
leave my mind blank while
the body throbs by his mere presence

Is it just me?
Is my woman dial up
way too high
drowning out logic and caution
self restraint and demureness?

Finding myself
remembering why I love
black men
the distinct magnificence that they create
by their very logic, simple existence
complicated rhythm, magnetic radiation

Wanting to internalize deep scent and
listen to native tongue
admire street rawness and
encourage pure brilliance

Not all possess it
but the ones that do
call to me so loudly by simply walking near
acknowledge me immediately
with a slight smile
a simple nod
realizing that I
recognize them for the true kings
they are

Trust me, girlfriend
allow yourself to enjoy
black men
to remember the innate thrill of them
to allow them to
take your breath away

Didn't Mean To Kiss Him

Didn't mean to kiss him
I swear I didn't
but wrapped in his arms
my mind went blank
all I could register was
the distinct impression
of manhood at its
finest peak

Its solid form
wrapped in perfection's physique
his grip so tight
eliminating the friendship hug
locking hip to hip and
chest to chest
his eyes closed
mine focused on his
wonderful face but seeing
nothing but future
envelope of caramel
me drowning in the
folds of this
wondrous creature

Those lips turned to magnets and
had to be tasted
had to be felt
drawn in and locked down
so light, so quick but
his eyes opened
met mine
delved into me
telling me what I needed to know
providing the passport
the entry
the special pass to return
to touch once again

The beginning and the end
or at least all I will ever tell

it started and ended with a kiss
a kiss that lasted an eternity
a lifetime
a night
or merely a second

I didn't mean to kiss him
I swear I didn't

The Sound of Your Voice

Heard his voice
and my spirit smiled
spreading throughout my core
igniting a chain reaction
of passion's thrill

Couldn't even place the recognition
why my feminine essence
leapt for joy
instantly connecting to
a sound it had longed to hear
so many weeks ago

You got me blown

I am not sure how or why
it is all very innocent
we kept it above board and proper
light and friendly
but each hug led unnecessarily to another
speaking lower and softer
such that we had to move closer and closer
while tension mounted and pressure piqued
my intense throbbing matched
the blank look of desire
overwhelming your beautiful face

And we both thought about it
considered it
gave in for a second
then pulled away

But you heard my joy, didn't you?
my purest response
my eagerness for another chance
when I heard your voice
receiving confirmation of mutual desire
knowing this time you won't
fade away
cause you thought about me
every day since and you now know
just the sound of your voice
moved me

I Should Tell You

I wonder if I should tell
just reveal what you do to me
Maybe at our next "chance meeting"
so well planned and orchestrated
that I should be ashamed

But I am not

I gotto lay eyes on you
like an addict I feen for our next meeting
the next touch
that next opportunity to
smile and gain response
see my reflection in your eyes
see my beauty through your reaction
discover my love
by your expression

Maybe I should just tell you
admit and be honest

I want you so much
Not all of you
just what you can give
when you can give it
But my tongue gets thick
whenever you approach and
apart from light flirting
I can't manage a sentence or a clear thought
much less an admission

I don't know what to do
but I gotto find a way
to let you know
to create the opportunity
if there is a slightest chance

I gotto to tell you

Monday, February 12, 2007

I Want You

I want you
want to be with you
want to learn you
discover you
test and try you

There are places we could go
discover
explore
without ever leaving this space

There are experiences
destinations
adventures of which we can partake
without leaving this arena

Just me and you

I can lead you there
if you release your mind
and willingly follow
I can teach you
if you trust me and believe in
the magic of us

I want to make love to you
give you a glimpse of
the wonder created
by a spark of genuine love
colliding with the intense need
to intertwine with you
to press fit my body into
your masculine template and
slowly ride the natural rhythm
the unique melody created by
the hum of us

I want to make love to you
if you'll let me

Always You

There is always you
always there
lurking in the corners of my mind
riding listless along the shadows of my thoughts

You are always with me
At first I ignored it or
remained oblivious
unaware how much I depended
relied on the smooth deep swell of your voice
calling my name
as only you still do

But lately I find myself jealous
when others fill your space
take your attention
nestle a place in your heart
and I have to remind myself
that
you are not mine and
you deserve the love
I can never give you but you
are worthy of so much more
all of me and what I believe I can be
because, at my weakest and strongest
you have always been
right here with me

The Cost of Me

How long would you wait
just for me
what do you think I am worth
and what are you willing to do

There is a price
for everything
good or bad
An inherent cost
a hidden fee

Have you wondered about
the cost of my love
no, not money
not dollars and cents

Loyalty and faithfulness
are the two conditions
the only real requirements
for them, I will give you the world
open up my deepest chamber
and reveal the most intimate
the secret to my very essence
the key to everything I will ever be
I will give it all
only to you

Do you think I am worth it?
are you prepared to handle
the price, the cost
the entrance fee
to focus your eyes and heart
only on me
to defend and protect whatever we are
For that, you can receive
every little bit
of me

What Do You Want?

What do you want from me
Really
in all honesty
tell me, don't be shy
I might laugh a little
maybe blush a slight bit
but I won't refuse you
I couldn't
even if I wanted to

Do you think you could possibly say
anything
that I haven't already thought on
already dreamed about

Do you think your mind
could expand past
the deep reaches and
far stretches of my
passion soaked imagination

Haven't you figured out by now
that I hold no reserves
dwell with minimal inhibitions
when the focus is you and me or
me and you or
you with me or
et cetera and so forth

so tell me, in all honesty
what do you want from me
will you promise me the chance
to fulfill whatever you desire
without judgment or reservation

if so, I promise I won't refuse you
I couldn't, even if I wanted to

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Would It Be Wrong?

Would it be wrong
to think on you?
Really?
to think about you
in the middle of my day
wondering whether I could
penetrate your armor
and bring to you
my smile

Would it be wrong
to want you?
Really?
To imagine caressing you gently
teaching true intimacy
enclosed space with minimal motion
holding and breathing
watching and learning
understanding the width and
indulging in your length

Would it be wrong
to experience you?
Really?
Letting go and seeking peace
in the wondrous annuls of your mind
the glorious channels
of your soul
the unique entry to your heart
through the passionate open
of oral response

Would it be wrong
to love you?
Really?
To look past flaw and
perceived idea
accepting the reality and
trueness that represents
effort and struggle
belief in the divine unity
of man and woman
of me and you
allowing it to guide
supersede and lead to eternity

Would it be wrong?
How could it be?

Married Man

talking and giggling
I glanced up to
check the time when
he walked in
looking like
goodness wrapped in caramel
dipped in masculinity
bulging and firm
gentle and kind

I hesitated
paused
interrupting conversation and
creating awkward space
cause instantly
I wanted to get lost
absorbed
released into
the very essence of this man

By just the look
the calm in the eye
the physique and cool swagger
speaking of past ruffneck
refined and reformed
to business cool

"Wedding ring"
my girlfriend whispered
but my eyes wouldn't look down
couldn't tear away
until he spotted me
then embarrassment
warm and stinging
swept through my person
sent alarms to my brain
explosions tearing through my mind
i turned abruptly
leaving that
married man
alone

Monday, February 05, 2007

Need Space

You have to leave some space
some air
a little room to breathe

Its impossible to deeply inhale
enjoy the fresh brisk breeze
sway with the delightful wind
when you come around

Like a vacuum
you seem to draw in
every imaginable particle
even light fades
sucked into your magnificent being
causing you to glow
brighter and
shine iridescent
while the entire world
becomes your mere backdrop

So, you gotto move
leave
go away and
allow sound to return to me
light to sprinkle its rays across me
wiggle fingers and shake hips
breaking through the
immobile cast
statue, figurine that I become
whenever you are around

I can't control me
near you
don't live life
so wrapped into you
everything else falls grey
in comparison
its not your fault, I know, but
there is no other solution

please, please go
so that
I can breathe again

Observed

"I notice every little thing
about you"
he said
and my heart hurt
the good kinda hurt
the breathless, deep desire
longing for a simple taste of you
type of hurt

cause the brotha noticed
paid attention
made me a priority
in the myriad of his life
thought on me
when i wasn't in his face
remembered me when
I hadn't been around

observed me with
subtle smile
eyes promising long nights of
intense passion
cause he would study me
learn my response
take note of my peak and
experiment with each reaction

my smile escaping me
lingering at the edge of my lips
unable to fight my surprises
at his sincerity, purity
natural beauty and
wonderful maleness

He noticed and
the thrill of it
made my heart hurt
breath escaped me, cause
this special man
took time to think
on me

damn

Completely Inappropriate

I began to stutter
my tongue felt thick in my mouth
head slightly light I
focused on the tip of my shoe
the blank wall behind you
to still my self
calm my nerves
hide my emotion

Completely inappropriate

What is wrong with me?
you shouldn't be on my mind
there is no scenario in which this could work
that we could operate
forge a space or a vibe
unique to us

Who would be hurt
lost
suffocated and strangled in the
bizarre twist and turns
of a uniting of us

It can't ever be
yet I stand here
stuttering like a fool
remembering that last hug and light kiss
as if my entire existence
was defined by it

I got to pull it together
cannot succumb
too much to lose
and nothing to gain
the mere entertaining of it
is completely inappropriate

Thursday, February 01, 2007

The Elevator

The simple melody of your voice
messed me up and
planted me to my spot

Runnin late, as usual
I slide breathlessly into the elevator
hoping that time will stop or
i can slip into the office, I stand unnoticed
in the elevator corner
between shifting feet and uncomfortable bodies
pressed tightly together

Then, I heard it
a deep flowing chuckle
a whispered "wassup"
soft, smooth
pouring over me like warmed honey
clinging to me, sticking, ringing in my head

I didn't want to turn around,
put face to such a beautiful voice
how could it not
disappoint
no matter how fine you actually were

So I stood still
wondering what that voice sounded like
calling my name in
the middle of the night
whispering, responding
filling me with promised innuendos
and stimulating me with
pure word play
charging my inner women
calling to her
coaxing her delayed response
hesitant bloom
engorging her every orifice causing
earth shattering release
by the simple sound of your voice

I couldn't move
watched my destination come and go
stood still in the corner of that elevator
waiting, hoping
you would clear out
move with the crowd
and I would never know and
could hold onto that sound
for an eternity

But our eyes met and
you knew
ten floors later
there was just
me and you
my overflowing desire and
your sensual deep voice
in that empty elevator

Any Purpose?

Tryin my hardest
not to hate you
not despise what I've
grown to be
Not look at the damp
darkness on the fringe of my life
and question my purpose
the point of me

Its a weakness
to keep falling for this game
to want love, need it so desperately
that common sense simply floats away
and every veiled explanation
spoken through clenched teeth
accepted and tolerated
because
not quite the truth
isn't really actually a lie, right?

Hell naw, the truth lies
in your action
in your inherent disinterest
your unwillingness to be fazed
Not pressed about where I be or
who I am with
waving off obvious gestures to
gain your attention
solicit some response

Hugged all up against this one and
kissing that one lightly on the cheek
you barely blink
out til 3 am
cause i stopped by his place
to pick up your cd, i think
directly to the shower I go
from you not a question, not a response
life just rolls on
reality is, you don't give a damn
cause the home to your heart
does not reside in me

Leaving me to examine
A continuous scroll of
unidentifiable emotions
splattered against the black canvas
of this relationship, this life
and I can't help but
start to hate you
because I no longer understand
the natural reason of being me